Tuesday, June 26, 2012

Emily Episodes 6 & 7 Updates

Hello, Folks. I appreciate the support but do confess that I owe all of you an apology for missing last week's post. I'm in Waco, Texas all week working on that death case I alluded to in my other excuse of a post. Without elaborating, I've been unavoidably preoccupied professionally for the past few weeks in addition to the mountiain of personal goings on in Some Guy's life.

In short, balance is elusive these days and I'm certain that the limited amount of balance this blog interjects into your day from time to time is sorely lacking from your lives. For that, I'm regretful. I appreciate your patience and the show of support--both on the blog and via email--that most of you have shown. For those of you who haven't been as supportive, I suppose there's a big part of me that understands the hostility. Tell you what. I'll forgive you if you'll forgive me.

The good news is that I've allotted some time to amalgamate my notes from Episodes 6 & 7 into a rudimentary post and I'll be carefully sculpting that material like Ryan sculpts his ridiculous pseudo beard. Granted, it won't take me three hours to complete that project, but the metaphor is fresh, so what the hell?

I'll be commenting on that as well as the ridiculous t-shirt he wore to lounge around the Man Suite before his date. After very careful analysis, I'm not entirely convinced that the shirt wasn't a onesie he got in the husky toddler's section at Baby's 'R Us. I swear that thing has snaps in the crotch. Annnnyyyyhooo . . . You'll be hearing from me in earnest shortly.

Thank you again from the top of my head to the bottoms of my turquoise loafers for checking in. For what it's worth, I miss y'all too.

DP

53 comments:

  1. Awesome! I've been there man. Had to withdraw during two seasons over the years when it simply got to be too much.

    Do what I do; offer to refund all the money they pay you.

    Looking forward to it
    Captain B.

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  2. Thank God you're still alive!!!

    from:anxiously awaiting :)

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  3. Happiness is hearing from Some Guy!!! :)

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  4. DP I wish i knew you in real life... i mean in person.
    You have a smooth, articulated swagger that conveys so attractivly in writing.
    Ive been awaiting your post for d-a-y-s now, yet after a few paragraphs... all is forgiven.

    cant wait for the conglomeration post!

    Lauren -ON, Can.

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  5. DP, it's so nice to see your comment and know you didn't miss out on Ryan's ridiculous tank top. You killed me when you said it must be a onesie! OMG, the mental image was not a pretty one, if you know what I mean.

    Looking forward to your post whenever you have the time, we know you do have a real job and a life to deal with.

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  6. I'm so glad a few bad apples didn't ruin the whole bunch. I wasn't sure if you'd write a blog at all this week much less catch up on last week. I'm sure we all look forward to it!

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  7. Well who would have thought that wish I made in that old clock in West Virginia would really come true. Can't wait!

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  8. And, that onesie would be too small - just the way Ryan would like it.

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  9. Having worked with lawyers on cases that take up their time I have understood your predicament completely all along and want you to know this! To add to that, you have been in the throes of moving and the gods know what-all else. So yes, I look forward to your blog and am ashamed for the few others who are self-absorbed like Ryan and it's all about them. I raised my grandson and when he wanted something it had to be right then or else. I call it the Grizzly syndrome. I never knew any grizzly bears personally but have read about them and seen them and they want it NOW or they will eat YOU up. These Grizzlies give "Anonymous" a bad name. If I had not had bad luck with Facebook connections I'd not remain anonymous for sure. Annnyyyhooo, your loyal fans and admirers salute you for your efforts to do this ridiculously addictive blog of yours. Macedonian Hussy

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  10. Some Guy:

    Been reading you all through college and I now find myself in my first post-grad job. I now know fully, finally, the pain everyone else has felt while they sit in cubes waiting for your post. I've hit refresh more than a few times in the previous week, while sitting in my own cube, avoiding a task, hoping no one notices me.

    For these others (I say others because a real lady would never be so rude) that give you sh*t for a delay on something they couldn't dream of coming up with is ridiculous. I'd love to see them reference Voltaire, a husky baby onesie while making very smart and very true comments on a reality dating show. Without forgetting a few anatomy jokes sprinkled in for good measure. It just cannot be matched elsewhere.

    As "Billy", the "customer service agent" I spoke with yesterday from Charter Cable told me, "If you are unhappy, you sign no contract. Quit using us."

    Glad to see the bad apples didn't ruin it for the rest of us! Thanks for breaking up our monotonous workdays with your take on our least favorite favorite show.

    Some Girl in Montgomery, Ala

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  11. DP, you are always worth the wait! So glad that you aren't letting the fools that are giving you a hard time ruin it for the rest of us. It is a privilege to read your posts and for those that don't recognize it as such, they need to move on! Thanks for giving us part of your valuable time when you can. There are several of us out here that sincerely appreciate it!!!

    Rose in OC

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  12. Nothing to forgive, DP, since your blog is an act of grace not an entitlement! Can't wait to hear your take on Emily's shorts worn on her date with Arie!

    Your posts are always worth waiting for.

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  13. DP - take your time, you're worth the wait. Totally understand your other commitments, and you don't owe any apologies to anyone; I only hope the fools that gave you grief for not posting last week's blog have the decency to formally apologize to you.

    Dianne, Toronto, ON

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  14. DP....
    Weren't those turquoise loafers the best???? Just when you thought he couldn't top the onsie, there again was the fashionista known as Ryan!!! Read you again soon!!
    B in NY

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  15. DP, there is nothing for you to apologize for. What you've got going on in your life is much more important. We miss you terribly but as I said last week, we'll still be here when you get back. Like Lauren above, I wish I knew you personally as well. Those who do, should feel blessed.

    Love the husky onesie line! Too funny.
    Denise in Alabama

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  16. Hope you at least get a bit of time to get together with Lincee which we will all want to hear about. I was cracking up thinking of that chach top as a onesie that Ryan had on! Great visual!

    Take your time-you are worth waiting for.

    Sal in Utah

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  17. If you are stuck in Waco, then might I suggest a gut pack from Vitek's BBQ or a Big O at George's to give you a short hiatus from the chaos.

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  18. DP! I was seriously starting to get worried about you. Glad you are okay. Did you get rid of your Facebook page? I was REALLY getting concerned when I couldn't find you on FB suddenly. Thought an angry reader had carted you off somewhere! Hope things settle down for you soon.

    Cindy (also in Alabama!)

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  19. You can post anytime - I just love your comments. And I'm glad your recent update centered on Ryan's tank b/c I was horribly concerned that I was the only one who found that top completely bizarre... WHAT???

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  20. Think these fires in UT have affected my brain-of course I know Lincee is no longer in Waco -duh!
    I hope you get some time soon to wow us with your wit on these last two episodes. Can't wait to see the hometown dates with some of the stuff I have been reading about one particular bachelor.

    Sal in Utah

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  21. I'm rooting for Jef. The way they relate seems much more real to me than things we've seen in the past. I think he looks like Anthony Michael Hall circa Sixteen Candles. If you google to pictures of the two, they look alot alike.

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  22. Can't wait to hear more from you in your awesome style!

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  23. Hmmmm heard a little gossip this am on radio station WPLJ New York. Seems that Emily is with Chris Harrison after all!!!!
    B from NY

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  24. Are you ever going to post again??? Sorry to be so harsh, but it's been almost 3 weeks since your last post. Offseason is one thing, but we are right in the thick of things during midseason. You can't act like Roger Ebert and expect us to treat you like Gene Siskel. This new job of yours is really starting to become a problem.

    MH

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  25. P.S. from Macedonian Hussy: You should not have to apologize. My sentiments echo verbatim those of Rose in OC above.

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  26. Wow MH You seem to think DP owes us....if anything we owe him for keeping us entertained with his comments AND FOR FREE I MIGHT ADD!
    The man does have a life, too bad if you don't!
    B from NY

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  27. Dear DP: What in the name of Zeus's b**t-hole? The Anonymous with initials MH just above my 12:31 p.m. is NOT your loyal Macedonian Hussy.

    To "MH"--You have serious entitlement issues. You're "sorry to be so harsh" toward Some Guy in Austin who has urgent priorities. And MH, you are not the center of the f**ing universe and should review your comments before posting them. This is the worst; I can't believe what I just read.

    (Sorry, DP, I am too old to keep my mouth shut about people like this.)

    Macedonian Hussy -- written out.

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  28. In defense of MH, I think the addition of "this new job of yours is really becoming a problem" was intended to signal that she/he was being sarcastic. As a friend of mine observed, there really should be a sarcasm font for use in the blogosphere . . .

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  29. I think MH is a personal friend of Some Guy's and is just giving him grief for fun. He isn't serious. Seems he is the fellow in an off-season post who he was with when they broke into that public pool with the two girls. I could be wrong but I don't think I am. I don't have the wherewithal to go look at old blogs so I am relying on my memory...

    Lori in Tampa

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  30. Jef with one F reminds me of Jif (as in Jiffy peanut butter). The swirl of the peanut butter reminds me of Jef's hair.

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  31. @ Lori in Tampa - Thanks for the support. You're right...I have been good friends with some guy since grade school. We grew up about 3 blocks from each other. Also, thanks for reminding me of DP's offseason post "My big sex scandle" - that's the post about the fiasco at the public pool. Definitely an offseason post worth reading and one of my personal favorites. It brought back some great memories for me of some great times with my best friend. Also, thank you to Anon as well for catching on to my sarcasm.

    As for B from NY and Macedonian Hussy - It's nice to see that DP has readers that would rush to his defense as quick as I would. However, I assure you that everything I said was in jest and I meant no offense. I'm actually probably one of his biggest fans. I hope that two of you can find it in your hearts to forgive me.

    However, with that said...you both might still be on to something. I'm sure that DP will agree that his life is more exciting than mine and will also be certain to point that out when we have lunch next week. As for me thinking that I'm the center of the universe and having entitlement issues....my wife would probably agree with you to a certain extent and will most likely enjoy reading your comments.

    I forget that Some Guy is semi famous now, so will try and be a little more obvious with my sarcasm the next time I razz him in public.

    Oh, and by the way, DP.....get off your ass and post something. I deserve better.

    MH

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    Replies
    1. How can I find the offseason "sex scandal" blog-when was it posted?

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  32. What a relief. Even if MH were not your initials I would have written the same comment.

    MH could've been anyone (except me), so you can see why I rushed to DP's defense. If you are who you say you are, it is a joke, and DP knows it, all is forgiven, especially after this last paragraph (only a lifelong friend would write "get off your ass and that [he] deserve[s]better?" :>) Macedonian Hussy

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  33. Wow,the comments thread is almost (but not quite) as entertaining as some guys blog!!

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  34. Long time readers know that MH is exactly who he says he is: a childhood friend of DP's and co-star of my favorite off-season post (Sex Scandal). I personally love your posts, MH, especially when you give DP a hard time. But I can see how others could miss the sarcasm.

    DP, Remember the adage about all work and no play. Enough said. :)

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  35. Hey MH... I think maybe you should pick up the slack while DP is preoccupied. Somehow I feel your posts would be just as entertaining. Something to think about...

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  36. Glad to see that I was wrong and DP has such a funny friend....maybe you could pick up the slack when he's busy!!!!
    B from NY

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  37. Yes please.
    I actually think i forget most of what happened in eps 6 at this point... now that we're nearing eps 8!

    enlighten us! as a pal of DP... You clearly must have the charming wit to match his articulated splendor! Give 'ol DP a run for his money... *wink-wink*
    Id have used the sarcasm font, but as previously mentioned...
    well, you get it.

    Lauren, ON
    xo

    Lauren, ON

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  38. DP, I'll forgive you if you forgive me that this is the first minute I've had all season to read your posts! I've had a delightful time catching up. Shout out to my uni -- Baylor -- and hope Wakko is treating you well. As another reader suggested, a Big O at George's should help you survive this busy time. Not sure if they have Lone Star, though. Any post you can squeeze in is a fun gift! Marti in Dallas

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  39. Thanks DP2, Hartamber and everyone else for the kind words and encouragement. With that said, I would not even be able to come close to filling DP's shoe's as a temporary replacment. I guess giving him a hard time comes easy because I've done it for so long and had a lot of practice. But his knack for storytelling and entertaining us through his writing is a skill set that I just don't possess. However, I will continue to give him a hard time for not posting in a timely manner so we can all enjoy his posts for what I hope continues to be many more seasons.

    MH

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  40. Hey, MH: It looks like you are getting fans of your own. I've just joined Team MH

    Hussy of Macedon

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  41. I'm just relieved I haven't missed much. Between work, home improvement projects and three Little League teams, I'm way behind on everything! Even missed two weeks of the show, and I'm not DVRing this season. Looking forward to your blog updates when things slow down, DP. Maybe I'll find out what I missed (or didn't). And MH, always a pleasure to read your posts too!

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  42. Alright, Folks. My business in the metropolis of Waco, Texas is concluded for the week and I'm homebound. I know I need to deliver big here and I'll do my best to get it done. Thank you all for supporting me. Sounds like MH is enjoying the ride on my coattails. MH, you're paying for lunch next week. You're welcome. DP

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  43. LOL..welcome aboard Hussy of Macedon...thank you as well, Claire! @DP - Whatever it takes to motivate your speedy return. Thanks for my time in the spotlight. All of the attention felt good, but it's nice to have you back in the driver's seat. I'll see you and your coattails next week.

    MH

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  44. I'll be looking forward to both. And thanks for the invite to lunch guys, but I don't think I can make it.

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  45. DP I rarely post but I really enjoy your blog and I hope things calm down for you and you get to take a big breather soon :)

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  46. Hilarious comments that I guess have to tide me over until DP's work schedule lets up and he gets back to the more important things in life, like blogging this show! MH, I think some of DP's loyal readers are especially sensitive and rush to jump to DP's defense because of some very negative comments in DP's entry from last week. But those who've ready DP for awhile know you are DP's good friend and could recognize the sarcasm. I find it very ironic that this is the season where DP's having trouble posting blogs considering it's his fave Emily (and her little white shorts, of course)! DP, can't wait to see what you have to say about the last two weeks, and the rumors that Emily is with Chris Harrison!

    Pat in CA

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  47. I only started following your blog during Brad's season with Emily, so I have been using my time usually spent reading your latest post and instead reading your older posts! You were just as funny in the beginning! For some reason I don't recognize most of the men's (women's) names. Shows how quickly their 15 minutes went by!!!
    B in NY

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  48. Helloooooooooooo???!!!

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  49. Lisa in MichiganJuly 2, 2012 at 1:30 PM

    Some Guy, no worries. I vote for going with the first commenter's suggestion of offering to refund us our money. You rock and don't let anyone tell you otherwise.

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