Tuesday, February 12, 2013

DP Faces the Cold, Hard Truth

Hello, Readers.  As always, welcome back to the modestly named Best Blog in the World.  For the observant ones in the crowd you've undoubtedly noticed that my title does not include the words "Bachelor" or "Sean."  For the non-observant ones, I'll pause a moment so you can look.  

It's true that I haven't posted about Episode 6 and, although I watched intently last night (my Sparkle hurts this morning), I have not yet posted about Episode 7.  The unfortunate truth is that my professional life (the real one that pays the mortgage and keeps me buzzing about town in my fancy German sedan) requires all of my attention and focus at the moment.  

I've alluded over the past few months to one of those all encompassing cases that come along every so often in a trial lawyer's career.  Think A Civil Action with Travolta or The Verdict with Newman.  Despite my best efforts, the case is going to trial very soon and my clients need me to be prepared.

I've often thought about posting a day in the life of a lawyer on this blog.  The truth is that I'm now sorry I've never done that.  Contrary to the usual images of lawyers as cheats, thieves, and liars the vast majority of the people I encounter in this profession are honorable, passionate, unapologetic advocates for their clients.  You see, I believe very strongly in "The System" and there is nothing quite like being tasked with guiding my otherwise helpless client through its corridors in search of a resolution.  (I'll spare you the word "Justice").  

My case is a case involving a horrific death that left a wife without a husband, three kids without a father, and eleven children without a grandfather.  It's contentious, exhausting, and (perish the thought) very personal.  Again, for the observant ones in the bunch, you saw where I was headed with this a few paragraphs ago.  Preparing for a three day trial with a few witnesses and a stack of documents is one thing.  However, preparing for a three week ordeal with 30 witnesses and stacks of boxes filled with documents is another.

Something must give (for a while anyway).  I'm officially going on hiatus for a few weeks.  I hope to be done in time to return for the end of the season.  For now, I'll stick to Twitter and live tweet during the show.  I appreciate those of you who have chosen to follow me.  For those of you who haven't, get on it!  SomeGuyinAustin or just click on the thingy on the right side of this blog.  

Thank you all for choosing to come here and share part of your lives with me on this blog.  I cannot put into words (how's that for irony) how much joy I get out of hitting the "Publish" icon and waiting for all of you to chime in every week.  Take care of yourselves, hug someone you love, have a wonderful Valentine's Day, and check in on me on occasion.  In the meantime, if you need me I'll be polishing my briefs until they Sparkle.   DP


  1. DP,

    You are still a great dude even without the post! Last nights episode was a barnburner for any blogger but there are more important things in life! Love you passion.

    Good luck with the case!

  2. Dear DP:

    I worked as a word processor in law offices for almost 20 years and never thought of lawyers as crooks. These lawyers were great. It was a great firm and of course being lead word processor and computer person I was intimate with reports, etc. Kudos to you, DP, for being who and what you are--both (apparently) a fine lawyer and a bada** and great blogger. You have a talent. I know it when I see it.

    I hope you get your sparkle back soon!

    Faithfully, Macedonian Hussy (apparently Earthquake from what I see on gmail...whatever)

  3. Maybe you need some rest. "Go to your cot. GO TO YOUR COT."

  4. I wasn't going to raise my eyebrow at this post, but I'm afraid I can't control it. (Wendy in CO)

  5. Go get 'em, DP. And when you tire of trial work (as most of us eventually do), I see a lucrative future repping "stars" from the Bach. The money Tierra would reap as spokeswoman for Maybelline waterproof mascara or Lindsay for David's Bridal could keep you in fancy sports cars for a long time. Maybe we can all amuse ourselves this week by suggesting endorsements for others from the franchise....

  6. Tell the truth-Since Sarah is gone (just like the lower half of her left arm) you just couldn't go on writing about this crazy show. Honestly I have to "hand" it to you for putting this tragic case first. Good luck! We will see you when you get back.

  7. Sean... Bowflex

    Emily... Botox

    Ben... Beaujolais

    Ashley... Bo (her dog)

  8. DP, though it pains me to say it, what you do on a daily basis is far more important than making us laugh about ridiculous people like Tierra. Good luck with your case. I'm sure your clients appreciate your hard work and efforts and I hope they know how lucky they are to be in your capable hands. Don't worry, we will be here when you get back....no one can quite make us laugh like you do! :)
    Rose in OC

  9. You had me at 'Hello, Readers'. No worries. Good luck on the case.
    Paula in Sacramento

  10. I'll miss your blog posts, but I'll just enjoy your tweets in the interim! Go kick some a** in court!

  11. Your witty recaps will be missed but I look forward to following you on Twatter...I mean Twitter.
    Best of luck with the trial.
    Don't let them take away your sparkle.

  12. DP,

    I would definitely read the "A Day in the Life of a Lawyer" post. I'm currently in law school, and one of the things they always harp on in our lunchtime workshops is "work/life balance." They tell us how hard it's going to be to have a personal life, to have a fun side, and be a lawyer at the same time. And each time that gets me down, I remind myself: If DP can work as hard as he does and still find time to watch the Bachelor, how bad can it really be? It gives me hope for a social life.

    Gretchen, 1L, and Haiku Contest Champion

  13. In the absence of a new blog, and suffering from withdrawal, I went back and read some older blogs that I had missed. I was struck by the one entitled " A Word About My Father" and the Jane Autin quote that you used in a previous blog came to mind. To parapharase: If you loved him less, you may have written about him more....I heard volumes in what you left unsaid.
    Best wishes in you up-coming trial and look forward to your future blogs...as always.

  14. I'm devastated! Good luck on your trial....I'll be waiting patiently for your return.


  15. For whatever reason I don't picture you buzzing around town in a fancy german automobile.. truck perhaps but german..

  16. I was surprised you got to be with us as long as you have been knowing that this case was on the horizon.
    Good riddance to "sensitive" "not about the drama" crocodile tears Tierra-Sean showed us he actually has some balls to send her home like he did. I am sure we all would have loved to read your take on this but alas, real life does take priority.
    Good luck with the case.
    Sal in Utah

  17. I hope you do post the "day in the life" entry. I would love to read that!

  18. DP,
    Your hilarious recaps seem necessary to make it through a season of the Bachelor/Bachelorette (especially this dreary one). However, having lost my father to what would be to others non-horrific circumstances, I can only imagine how much this family must appreciate your diligence on their behalf. Win one for the good guys!! I, and I would like to think I can speak for most, if not all of your fans, will wait as long as it takes for you to finish your case, rest your soul and replenish your SPARKLE!!

    Not so sure about "A Day in the Life of a Lawyer"! I think "A Day in the Life of Lawyer DP" would be more fun!!

    Jackie in Madison

  19. Best of luck to you DP in your case! I truly hope everything works out for you and for that family. I've had lawyers in family as well as worked with many and most of them are the good guys.

    Get some rest too, and I look forward to your return.

  20. sounds heavy. all the best of luck!
    we can forgive your absence.... but look forward to your return.

  21. DP,
    Best to you! and for those of us who just cant get enough... its great fun talking a walk down memory lane and reading the past entries!

    I rummaged through your blog history, and came up with this little gem!! Boy you have a way with words!!!

    I copied and pasted for all to enjoy. Titled:
    Twas the Week Before Bachelor
    an adaptation by Some Guy in Austin (Circa Dec 2010)

    ~Twas the week before Bachelor, when all through the house
    The DVR was silent, we talked to our spouse.
    The vodka was chilled in the freezer with care,
    In hopes that Chris Harrison soon would be there.

    The contestants were nestled all snug in their beds,
    While visions of rose ceremonies danced in their heads.
    And Some Guy with a bottle and a Lone Star bottle cap,
    Wondered how many contestants for sure had the Clap.

    When out at the Mansion there arose such a clatter,
    Harrison sprang from the strip club to see what was the matter.
    Away to the Mansion he flew like a flash,
    Jumped a big bar stool and threw a stripper some cash.

    The moon on the breasts of the girls on the show
    Proved there were some women who could never say no.
    When, what to Chris Harrison’s eyes should appear,
    But a big fat stretch limo, filled with hussies desperate for beer.

    With a freshly pressed sport coat, so Money and slick,
    Harrison knew in a moment he’d be getting paid quick.
    More rapid than eagles the limos they came,
    And he whistled, and shouted, and called them by name!

    "Now Ashley! now, Britnee! now, Keltie and Stacey!
    On, Cristy! On, Jackie!, on Lauren and Lacey!
    To the top of the porch! to Bachelor’s first ball!
    Now drink away! Drink away! Drink away all!"

    Lone Star after Lone Star was drunk by Some Guy,
    As he plotted to watch with his careful, keen eye.
    Then up to the Mansion, a new limo it flew,
    With the tray full of roses, and the new Bachelor too.

    And then, with a twinkling, it was heard on the floor
    The prancing and fawning of each little whore.
    Desperate and anxious the girls turned around,
    Down the hallway The Bachelor came with a bound.

    He was dressed all in fleece, from his head to his boots,
    And we wondered if the producers and he remained in cahoots.
    A bundle of roses he had flung on his back,
    And he looked like a douchebag, with the last name Womack.

    His eyes-how they twinkled! his dimples how merry!
    His cheeks were like roses, his nose like a cherry!
    His ears were perked up as if he’d been listening,
    And the girls pictured him naked, his abdominals glistening.

    He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work,
    And axed the plain women who then called him a jerk.
    As the rose bearing women looked down from their noses,
    We heard, “say your goodbyes if you don’t have no roses!”

    Harrison sprang to his limo and to the tramps gave a whistle,
    And flew to the strip club like a giant love missle.
    But I heard him exclaim, when he drove out of sight,
    "Merry Christmas to all! Tune in Monday Night!" ~

    -We will miss your cunning way with words DP, But I do plan to stick around for your return!!

    As always,
    L. In Ontario

  22. You were the only reason to watch this dumb show....I'll bet their numbers go way down!! Good luck to you with your case and the rest of your real life!!!!


  23. Most of DP's loyal readers probably already know about Lincee Ray over at ihategreenbeans.com, but if you don't, you can get a great dose of Bachelor recapping over there, to hold you over.

    Good luck with your case, DP! I'm a lawyer too, and I can't imagine that you took the time even to post your "I don't have time" entry while preparing for trial.

  24. DP while I miss your truly creative slant on bachelor trials, tribulations and other nonsense in general at least we know how you are. We know that you are safe but busy. Do you know anything about Barbarossa's Blast? The captain himself seems to have taken a walk off the plank, sure hope all is well with him. Any info?

  25. This may finally push me to join The Twitter....not even sure is 'the' belongs in front of it! Alas...good luck!

  26. You are missed DP! For those who long for a good snarky recap, I really like babefromtheburbs.com and she's Canadian too :)